Like all blissfully pleasant things in life, the high times come with hurdles, and the occasional bad trip. The problems often manifest due to the stigma that associates with the use of marijuana. But hopefully, the stigma will recede as pot becomes more accepted as a recreational drug. Yes, smoking pot is an ordeal in many places,and as it appears, all stoners experience the same problems. So you may be wondering what stoner problems are. Here is a list of some common stoner problems. It’s high time we made these problems a thing of the past.
25. People Always Bumming Your Weed
Nothing makes new friends quicker than the smell of some dank weed. Sometimes you may want to make friends. Other times, you may want to chill by yourself and not give your bud away. Try saying this right before some moocher takes a hit: “Go ahead. You can really taste the formaldehyde I added.”
24. Every Car Is A Police Car
Paranoid? Probably. But just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean there isn’t a bunch of cops waiting in KFC’s car park ready to force your face into the pavement and arrest your ass right there.
23. Talking To Someone High And Being Unable To Decide On A Normal Blinking Rate
Are they blinking and speaking right? Am I speaking and blinking right? Woh.
22. When You’re Sharing A Joint And Someone Slobbers All Over It
What were you doing with that blunt, man? There’s more drool on it than a bloodhound’s chew toy. Gross.
21. Going On Holiday To A Place Where You Have No Weed Connections
When you run out of weed and you’re not amongst your usual circle, you’re gonna have a bad time. Shall we just, like, go home already?
20. Thinking About Health Problems While High
Big mistake, buddy. The moment you enter the realm of NHS forums or the frightening WebMD, you’re screwed. You’re having a stroke, or is it a brain aneurysm? Maybe you should write down some kind of will now? Are your cheeks swelling? Oh god they are. Stop thinking about your funeral and remember, exactly ZERO people have died from weed. Slowly step away from the Internet.
19. When Someone Smoking Your Blunt Decides To Tell You Their Life Story
We all know your game. It’s puff-puff-pass, not hold the damn blunt for ten minutes while telling us all about your friend of a friend of a friend who has genuinely seen the Loch Ness monster. Hand it over!
18. When Your Parents Ask If You’ve Been Smoking Weed
Trying to converse with anyone outside your immediate social circle calls for intense concentration, so this one is a situation you definitely want to avoid while blazed. Sometimes, though, it’s inevitable. Whether it’s your parents, friend, colleague or partner behaving inquisitively in regards to your glazed eyes and eau de pot; the harder you try to act casual, the worse it becomes.
17. Forever Dreaming About The Day Pot Is Legalised
Flower to the people! Oh, wait, it was just a dream. There’s more and more countries decriminalising marijuana possession; with Santa Fe City Council in New Mexico the most recent to force a public vote on the matter. If it goes ahead, it would make the possession of an ounce or less of marijuana a civil infraction punishment of a fine no more than $25. Not ideal, but better than nothing.
16. When You’re Dragged Into A Situation Unexpectedly And You’re Higher Than The God Damn Heavens
Picture the situation: you’re comfortably stoned in bed playing Skyrim, when suddenly your mother calls asking you to accompany her to IKEA as she can’t carry her new swanky wardrobe alone. What a complete and utter nightmare. Can we just sit down a second first?
15. Watching Anything About The Universe While Stoned
Holy sheepin’ scienceballs. You’re asking for a mind-raping if you watch anything involving Neil Degrasse Tyson or Stephen Hawking after a smoke: you can be in awe to the point of god damn tears with this stuff. A mere stray thought about the meaning of life can send you into a gaping black hole of unmitigated brain-melt.
14. Forgetting Whether It’s Your Turn To Toke…
…or your turn to pass the bowl. Turns out, no one else can remember either. Chances are, regardless of who messed up the rotation, it’s probably you that gets skipped.
13. Trying To Compose A Text While High
We totally did remember to reply to that text… we just forgot to send it.
12. When You Regret Your Munchie-Marathon The Next Morning
They’re totally right – marijuana is a gateway drug. Directly to the fridge.
11. You’ve Run Out of Papers
It can sneak up on the best of us. You saw the pack, but maybe you didn’t peek inside and before ya know it, the papers are all gone. It’s ten to midnight and you’re in panic mode; how fast you can get your boots on before the bodega closes? Screw this nonsense. With Daily High Club, you’ll never have to worry about running out of, or busting up, smoking supplies. More than an online headshop, for as little as a dollar a month you can have all natural papers delivered right to your doorstep in specially tailored smoking subscription boxes.
10. You Smell Like Pot
Is that weed I smell or I smell like pot? Nope, you do not smell pot,and yes, you smell like pot. This is a common problem among stoners. The upside is many stoners attract mates due to this smell – you know that birds of a feather thing. The scent can help you identify your fellow stoners. But pot aroma does not always appeal to every occasion, and not everybody appreciates it –whether it is lingering in your room or clothing. You do not want to attend your little cousin’s birthday party having that scent or have your parents give a surprise visit when your room is full of the smell. In short, you just do not want people smelling weed on you. The following can help. Try smoking outside, it helps. You can go for edibles or vape instead of burning a blunt. Alternatively, smoke naked or use body spray to mask the smell. Use air freshener if you smoke indoors.
9. You Broke Your Pipe
Your roommate kept telling you not to leave the pipe on the railing above the staircase and it was only a matter of time before they got to tell you I told you so. There’s no sense in crying over spilled borosilicate glass. Sweep up the shards, dust yourself off, and set your gaze on the horizon.
8. The Munchies Kick In, and There is Nothing in The Fridge
Pot makes you feel hungry, and it can make you eat all the food in the kitchen. Well, your stomach can ruin your buzz,and you do not want this to happen. Stock snack in your cupboard at all times. You never know when the munchies will knock and you want to be ready when they do. Delivery services can save the situation, but they are not always reliable especially if you are smoking pot late in the night.
7. You Cannot Find Your Lighter
You rolled your stuff or prepared your bowl, right music, drinks and everything is perfect, but you cannot find your lighter. If you have been here, you understand how it can ruin the mood. Your lighter is the easiest thing to lose or misplace. You can improvise by using matches and lighter fluid. Use your stovetop to light up a rolled piece of paper. Since you likely to lose your lighter when you carry it outside, buy one that is not pocket-friendly – gives you challenges moving it around in your pocket.
6. Cotton Mouth
You are enjoying good bud with your buddies. And once you finish a bowl, all of a sudden your mouth feels so dry. Stoners often experience cotton mouth at some point. Although common, you can easily avoid this problem. The answer is simple just have a drink. Always prepare something to sip before you begin smoking.
5. Your Dealer Got Busted
Who will supply you with good stuff at a reasonable rate just like your dealer? This is a tough question,right? What if they track it back to me? The situation becomes even scary. This fear cuts across every stoner in the same position. Raids do occur even in corporate institutions. Relax the cops are often more interested in the dealer than the consumer. Find another dealer.
4. Your dealer is not communicating back
You text, “can I get some for $ 30?”Then you wait. In many cases, the problem is not with the dealer. The real stoner problem is what your mind thinks. What if my dealer is busted? If the dealer is busted, will they trace me? Might he or she be dry? Where can I find another dealer? At least you expect some replies for your text,but they are not replying. Sometimes patience works well here. Just relax, avoid paranoid thoughts and hope all is well.
3. Red Eyes
Are my eyes red? Some stoners often ask when they smoke weed. Just buy some eye drops. They are quite cheap. You can also try sunglasses they are cool.
2. You Are Skipped in The Circle
After taking a few hits of good stuff you soon get high. That’s when stoners find it problematic to keep track of whose turn it is in the circle. You are high the stories are exciting,and you quickly forget who it should go to next and you cannot even tell from where it came. That is not good. Worse is when you get skipped in the circle.
1. You Are Out of Weed
This is the one stoner problem you do not want to encounter. No stash equals a bad day for a stoner. There are many reasons for running out of weed. Probably your supplier failed (quite rare unless he is arrested), you had a couple of friends that smoked it all yesterday,or you do not have money to restock. Probably not so helpful but the answer will depend on the problem. No money? Find a job, earn some money get some weed and enjoy your day. If you have to, you can scrape the resin that accumulates in your pipe over time. It will get you some THC.